So I got on the scale this morning... something I am NOT allowed to do by protocol, and I definitely won't be telling L (dietician) I did it. But I was about 96.4 or something? Which means that I've only gained about 3 lbs total. Plus I'm still in the double digits, which I LOVE. It actually made me calmer to weigh myself and see the number, instead of imagining how fat I must be getting now, and having horrible spiralling thoughts about it. Even if I'd been like 100, though it scares me shitless even to say that, I would rather have known so I could deal with it, you know?

Anyway, I obviously went on my overnight, and it went pretty well, actually. I fucked up my sleep schedule because I wanted to stay up, because I was so excited about being home and I wanted to DO things, you know? So I ended up eating my "breakfast" at like 3-4 am, which I considered pretty legitimate as I was ravishingly hungry, and I knew I wasn't getting up at 8 or 9 am to eat it. But then I must have slept through my alarm, because I didn't even wake up till 12:15 . I was supposed to have been back by noon to eat lunch. In the end it took me so long to get back that I missed lunch altogether, even though I had called the unit as soon as I woke up and explained, so I'd figured they'd've held my lunch for me... but I guess not. It hardly mattered to me, to be honest, because I basically spent all day between meals and snacks sleeping, since my night meds were still somewhat in effect.

Today I woke up when the nurse woke me up for breakfast, as usual, and right now I feel physically tired, though not really tired enough to go back to bed. I could easily lie down, however. But I'm fairly happy because I'm still relaxed, plus I brought a ton of stuff to do back -- many new books and movies, and also my iPod docking station . I think the music might make a HUGE difference for me. I forgot my earphones in my purse, but I can go outside later and put them in my jacket. They didn't even bother checking my bags when I got back... I could have taken ANYthing from home. But I actually didn't take anything I'm not supposed to have, as I have no self-harm urges right now, & I wouldn't get away with other types of things anyway.

So yeah... there are my bored-on-a-Sunday-morning hospital rambles. Oh joy oh bliss. :P