Being at my old house seems to be a trigger. Hmmm. Maybe it's just because I realize afresh how stupid and fucking pointless my life actually is while I'm here.

On the up side, I got on my scale tonight, wearing only my t-shirt and undergarments, and it said 127.2. OMG WTF. I am ridiculously happy about this. Also, I tried on a pair of my old size 10 jeans and they fit!! *does a happy dance* I know size 10 probably doesn't seem very small, but compared to a 12 it feels like I'm a million times smaller. 12 is just fucking ridiculous, anyway. Gargantuanely fat. Especially on someone who's only 5'3.5". Size 10 is not small, but at least I'm not quite as GROSS AND FAT as I used to be. Gotta try and keep hold of my eating, though, so that I don't gain anything. I think I will freak the fuck out if I gain much from where I am right now. And by "much" I mean like... more than a pound. But more especially if I gain the pant size back. I DO NOT WANT TO GAIN THAT SIZE BACK.

Crazycrazycrazy.