109.2 lbs.

Nearly froze my arse off today walking home from the grocery store (which is about ten minutes from my house). It's only 9C (48F) outside -- add wind chill and a relatively light "jacket" and you have COLD. Well, at least when you put an eating disordered kid inside the light jacket. When I got in the house my hands and ears felt just like they would if I'd been walking during a winter's day. This makes me a bit scared for what winter has in store for me. But I'll deal with that when the time comes.

I've eaten so little so far today that it ought to scare me, but it doesn't. Not really, anyway. I just know that if I force myself to eat now, I'll be silently giving myself permission to stretch my stomach even further by eating even more calories -- which I have done before, and which I do not want to do again. So I am resisting eating when I don't want to eat, even if it means eating fewer calories. Whatev'.

I'm really just going for broke right now -- it's all or nothing at this point. And y'all get to watch as I start my descent down the hill in a railway trolley, my hand not even on the brake. Soon not even I will recognize my own face, so speedy and imminent will my descent be.