I don't want to be unhealthy, but I do want to be thin.
I don't want to get caught in the ED shit again, but I want to lose some weight.
I don't want to get completely obsessed with and anxious about food, but I don't want people to judge me as having a pudgy stomach, gross love handles, too much flab in general.
I don't want to feel like the ED is the only thing I have left in the world, but I don't want to have to be reliant on other people for my happiness.
I don't want to bring myself close to death yet AGAIN, but I don't want to fail at life either, and I always seem to want to have a back door.
So WHAT the FUCK do I DO!?!?!?
2 comments:
Are you caught up in masturbation addiction which can and often does lead to all of these disorders that you are experiencing? If so then there is your problem. Our sexuality and our expressions of same are deep and powerful driving forces in our lives. When the young filly reaches maturity she wants to breed and have babies. If she were not allowed to she would always be longing and wanting and looking and never satisfied. We humans compound this natural reaction a hundred fold with all of the stimulants and drugs and sugar and carbohydrates and caffeine and pharmaceuticals and then distort this with still more compounds and substances and then all of our beliefs and cultural mores compound all of this. Many a young girl is being destroyed with all this. The middle east regions circumcise young girls(a terrible thing) to stop this perfectly natural and healthy maturing process. The problem here is that with all these emotions and feelings having been distorted with all of the above mentioned and more is how can a mature and healthy relationship be secured. A healthy 'normal' birth rather than the sedated modern birth is also very important here(body and emotion and spirit combine in ecstasy during a natural birth delivery)a very natural healthy thing. I wish I could help you and I wish I could help the millions of others who suffer this insanity. Young males are also caught up in this dilemma and being destroyed equally by the millions. I can do nothing but utter a few words here and there. Best and good luck to you. Tom
Um, I don't know what you do, but if I figure it out I will definitely tell you. Please tell me if you figure it out. I swear I could have written some of these posts too. I don't know what to say, but I wanted to say I hear you!
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