Went to the psychiatrist yesterday, and was talking about the ED being worse, having dropped school, etc. I told him, among other things, that my anxiety was a large part of the reason the recovery efforts I've made on my own haven't worked. He then offered to either try upping my Effexor dose, or start me on a small dose of an atypical antipsychotic, to help with the anxiety.

I quickly made it clear that I didn't think an Effexor increase would help, as I lost the most weight (50lbs in 4 months) when I was on a dosage of Effexor twice as high as it is now. However, I was worried about the weight gain side effects of antipsychotics, as I knew from friends' experiences that the reason people gain weight is because the pills make them hungrier, and I was afraid that I'd get increased/uncontrollable binge urges from certain ones, etc. He decided to try me on a low dose of Risperdal, as he said that has one of the lowest incidence of weight gain side effects among the atypical antipsychotics.

So I took my first dose, 1mg, last night, and... oh my GOD, the drowsiness. I woke up during the night and was vaguely afraid I'd stop breathing or my blood pressure would go too low, as I recall, because my physical body felt SO drugged. And today I am still in a stupor... it's hard even typing this. I AM hungrier, too, but today I think it's because I'm so drowsy/dopey that my body's trying to make me eat more to get some extra energy. Only I know that's not going to work, because food can't fix an artificial agent in my bloodstream/brain that's making me sleepy. I know this side effect will wear off within a couple of days, but OMFG, it's so bloody annoying for the moment. I just want it to go away now. Ugh.