Was really agitated last night... am really irritable and depressed-like this morning. Am listening to angsty music on YouTube now... Evanescence, to be exact. Actually, one of the songs was the one in my signature. I do love that song. The other people in the room didn't really appreciate my angsty rock, but who the fuck cares anyway?? Hahaha.

Supposed to meet with Dr. C today. Dr. Mo has told me twice now, on two separate days, that I will definitely see Dr. C by the end of today, so I'm really hoping it will actually happen. I told them I wasn't safe off the ward yesterday, but I'm going to see about being allowed to go on 20-minute passes if someone is going with me, like if people go out for a smoke or whatever. I don't trust myself alone still, but if I'm with other people I'll have to behave, or they'll call security or whatever on me, which would not be fun. But it might be nice to be able to, you know, go to Tims and buy whatever I want, or buy Diet Pepsi for myself, or blah blah blah. A magazine or a Sudoku book or something, even. Whatever.

Ugh... oh, god, I really am irritable, though. I want to get the fuck out of here so badly. The problem is, I don't think I trust myself for extended periods on the outside... I really don't. So maybe accompanied 20-minute passes would be good for me, so I don't get as fucking stir-crazy. I don't know. All I know is that at this point I basically hate everything and (almost) everyone.

Fmfl, seriously.