100.2... and that was after I accidentally drank a small quantity of fluid before weighing in. Evidently yesterday's weight was no fluke.

Waging sociological battles on [blog site] has taken the piss out of me this evening, and I'm just... tired. Not that the purging and starving doesn't already make me tired enough. But this is like a soul tired. I'm so fucking sick of arguing with anti-racists and anti-isms people about why their methods might not be working and why certain things that they say probably shouldn't be said. I can't get them to understand, and it's so fucking FRUSTRATING. I wanted to have some down time on [blog site] after, to take my mind off it, but whaddaya know... I reached my fucking post limit. So now all my stupid debate crap is stuck at the TOP OF MY JOURNAL for like 3 hours. I'm just... irritable. Grumpy about the whole fucking thing. It makes me so mad that we're all fighting with each other when we should be friends and actually be fucking doing something about this shit. Why the allies are picking fights with allies I simply don't understand. It's the biggest load of shit I ever heard of and I'm so, so sick of it. I might have to take myself out of it for awhile just to clear my head.

What happened to the [blog site] that used to be a fun, safe space for me to vent and play around? Show pictures of pretty things, funny things, fandom things? Why do I now log onto [blog site] every day and get discomfitted by at least a fifth of what I read on a given day? Why is it that even though I now understand their POVs I still can't agree with them? Maybe unfollowing certain journals would let me take a break and try to regroup, think things through better. I still want to understand, and help if I can. I'm just not sure this is the most good-for-my-mental-health way to go about it. And we all know my mental health isn't good to begin with.

I just got totally sidetracked... so I guess I'll leave this where it stands. Another day of ED; another day of frustration and wishing things could change; another day of nothing changing. But I guess that's just going to be how my life is for -- well, I only wish I knew how long.